Foster families offer homes, not just shelters
In Kosovo, children without parental care are raised by the love of foster families.
By Arian Hajdaraj — 28/7/2025
On an early spring morning, Behrije Nrecaj-Gashi rolls up her sleeves to wash the concrete-paved yard of her home, located on the outskirts of the Shtime municipality. With her feet only halfway slipped into her slippers, she walks to the corner of the yard where a single flower grows — planted long ago by her late husband, Safet. The yellow water pipe trickles slowly, but she still takes care to water the flower, a quiet tribute to the man she once imagined a future with in that very yard.
Since July 2024, when Safet died, Behrije’s life has changed. Every obligation they once shared now falls on her shoulders. In addition to the responsibilities of housework, she also bears the burden of caring for Genci, the six-year-old whom she and Safet had taken into their care in 2019.
“The day they brought Genci to us was March 11, the birthday of our eldest son. He was six months old,” recalls 54-year-old Behrije. Genci was a baby without parental care, born with health problems.
Her story is interrupted as she lifts Genci, who is almost motionless, into her arms and places him in the chair where he feels comfortable, in front of the television. Her attention is drawn to a toy slipping from Genci’s hand. Gently placing it back into his still-wet fingers, she hugs him warmly and continues her story about him.
Caption: Genci, with his favorite toy in hand, watches cartoons.
When Behrije and Safet took him into their care, they were told he had Down syndrome, but they did not know that, in addition to this, he also had other serious health problems, including heart and kidney disorders. As a result of these conditions, he underwent surgery three years later. Today, however, he lives a more normal life.
“Genci is a very calm child. He never cries. He wakes up early, usually at seven. Then I take him outside. He has allergies to pollen. He has therapy. But he loves nature very much,” said Behrije. Despite the challenges, he has become a great support for her.
“Genci has become my friend. When I wake up, I know I will take care of him: dress him, feed him. Every day, he takes away my worries, even though he can’t speak. He is very attached to me,” she said.
For Behrije, caring for children without parental care has already become the story of her life. Genci is the 26th child she has temporarily sheltered. After the end of the 1999 war in Kosovo, Behrije and Safet, together with their three children, returned from Switzerland, where they had been staying as refugees. A few years later, in 2006, a call to become a foster family set their journey in motion — one that continues even after 19 years.
“We saw a story on television that said, ‘Become a foster family – save a life,’” she said. They were in their thirties at the time and decided to become a foster family, opening their hearts and home to a child in need of love and care.
So, they took their first child into their care in 2006, just a month after completing their training to become a foster family.
“She was a five-week-old girl. She was in poor health. It was a big responsibility. That night, we took the whole family with us. We raised her for four months,” said Behrije. “Then, she was put up for adoption, here in Shtime. We have contact with her. She is 19 years old.”
Apart from Genci, whom Behrije has been taking care of for almost six years now, the other children stayed with her for shorter periods, as those in good health were usually adopted sooner.
“We had no idea it would last 20 years,” she said, holding a small diary in her hands. Alongside photographs of her biological family, she has carefully recorded all the details of the children who have been in her care. For each of them, she has written the date they were taken in, the day they left after being adopted, and the nicknames they were called during their time in her home.
Just a few kilometers from Behrije’s house, also in Shtime near the road to Koshare, Blendi is growing up. He has just turned 19 months old.
Arbenita Nuredini, 28, in whose family Blendi is being raised, recalls the days when, as a mother of two young children, she and her husband decided to become a foster family and to provide care for another child. They were inspired by relatives who had previously been foster families.
“My husband’s aunt was part of a foster family. Every time we visited, the children loved us — they sat on our laps, they left a very good impression on us. And one day I said to my aunt, ‘Can I become a foster family too?’”
But at the time, her second son was still not three years old, and she says she was told to wait until he reached that age before taking on another child. In the meantime, she completed training on how to care for children without parental care, which paved the way for her to realize what she now calls her dream: caring for children in need.
In September 2024, Arbenita was visited by officials from the Center for Social Work (CSW), who told her they had an emergency case — a child who needed immediate shelter. Despite expecting her third child, a girl, Arbenita was able to take Blendi into her care alongside her two now-grown sons, one 10 and the other almost six.
“The day I took Blendi, the two boys were waiting for us at the door. We welcomed him with joy and love,” recalls Arbenita, holding Blendi in one arm and her biological daughter in the other — the daughter she gave birth to a few months after becoming a foster mother.
Along with the new energy and great love that Blendi brought, he also presented Arbenita and her husband with a deep emotional challenge.
“In the training, they taught us not to let the children call us ‘mom’ and ‘dad,’” Arbenita said.
This instruction, which means avoiding deep emotional attachment since foster care is temporary and eventual separation is part of the process, remains the most challenging for Arbenita.
“When he calls me ‘mom,’ I don’t respond, but then he comes and touches me,” she says. “When he was six months old, he called my husband ‘dad.’ He answered too — he said, ‘I can’t resist not answering him.’”
Arbenita’s and Behrije’s families are just two of the 40 foster families currently operating throughout Kosovo. These families provide temporary care for approximately 65 children who lack parental care for various reasons, ranging from abandonment immediately after birth, abuse, temporary inability of parental care, and removal of parental rights by court order.
Few foster families
Foster care is one of the four forms of protection for children without parental care, alongside residential care, institutional care, and supervised independent living.
This form of care began to develop in Kosovo in 1999, with the activity of Amici di Bambini, a non-governmental organization composed of adoptive and foster families. Since 1986, it has worked worldwide to combat abandonment and support children in institutions.
In 2015, responsibility for this service was transferred to the Organization for Children Without Parental Care (OFAP), a national humanitarian association focused on protecting children without parental care. OFAP is licensed to provide psychosocial services to these children.
In this regard, OFAP constitutes a key link in the alternative care system for children in Kosovo. The organization is constantly committed to identifying families willing to care for abandoned children or children who have been legally separated from their biological parents by court order. This decision is usually made in cases of physical or psychological violence against the child, or violence in the interparental relationship, which makes the family environment unsafe for the child’s development.
Albana Hoti, project manager at OFAP, explained the procedure a family must follow to take on the responsibility of sheltering a child without parental care during a visit to the Arbenita family. According to her, the family is first reported to the CSW at the local level — public institutions responsible in each municipality for the protection of children in need.
The CSW evaluates the application based on the criteria set out in the Administrative Instruction on Shelter. Families must meet several conditions: they must not have been prosecuted; they must undergo recruitment and assessment of their economic situation; they must have sufficient space; maintain a stable relationship as a couple or family; and have the willingness of other family members to provide support.
Meanwhile, families that meet these conditions undergo five-week training. “We hold specific training for families. We have families who specialize in caring for particular children: infants, abused children, children with disabilities,” said Hoti.
According to Hoti, the application is sent to a panel at the Ministry of Justice, and if everything meets their conditions, it is approved. “It is a procedure that takes several months,” she said.
Foster care is a temporary placement for children without parental care, such as babies abandoned immediately after birth. These abandoned babies are usually taken by the guardianship body at the CSW immediately after birth in the hospital and then placed in foster families within the respective municipality.
The state temporarily places these children under the care of foster families until a permanent solution is found, such as adoption. Initially, care is sought within the immediate family circle — grandparents, aunts, uncles, or other relatives — where over 400 children are currently placed. But when this is impossible, placement in foster families is sought.
In Kosovo, however, the number of foster families remains insufficient. It is much lower than international standards, which recommend at least three foster families per municipality. Of the 38 municipalities in Kosovo, only 15 have foster families. As a result, children are often placed in municipalities far from their birthplace.
“In the municipality of Fushë Kosovë, we have only one foster family,” said Abaz Xhigoli, as he opens the door of his office, which is surrounded by greenery. He serves as the director of the CSW in this municipality.
“But we have three children in foster care. One of them, an 18-year-old with disabilities, is placed here in Fushë Kosovë. The other two are placed in other municipalities,” said Xhigoli, holding the list of 20 children that the municipality has placed in foster care since the war.
During his time at the CSW, Xhigoli has encountered various cases, many of which remain deeply etched in his memory. With his glasses in hand, he says the first thing he recalls are cases when he took newly abandoned babies into care.
“Some children are abandoned immediately after birth, without even being named. So, the first burden for us is deciding on the child’s name,” he said. “Case managers consult with legal guardians about names. It often happens that the name is decided on the way to the hospital or from the hospital to the foster family.”
Among the main services that the CSW provides for children without parental care are: assigning a case manager and legal guardian, drafting an individual care and development plan, placing the child in foster or residential care, conducting monitoring visits, and following procedures for reunification with the biological family or adoption when possible.
However, according to the Coalition of NGOs for Child Protection (KOMF), CSWs fail to carry out regular monitoring visits due to the large number of children in need of care and their inability to cover all of them. According to KOMF, this seriously undermines the protective function of CSWs and contributes to a lack of continuous supervision, which is essential for the safety and development of children in alternative care.
CSWs in Kosovo, which were decentralized in 2009 to improve access to social services, continue to face serious structural challenges. The transfer of responsibilities from the central level to municipalities found many municipalities unprepared for this role, which face significant shortages in funding, trained staff and basic equipment, such as adequate vehicles or premises. According to the Ombudsman’s report for 2019 and KOMF data for 2020, existing CSW staff are overburdened, there is a lack of conditions for dignified work, and the infrastructure often fails to meet the requirements for providing sensitive services — such as those for children without care, victims of domestic violence, trafficking survivors, or people with disabilities.
At the national level, 40 CSWs operate, covering a total of 47 categories of beneficiaries, including children without parental care, victims of domestic violence, trafficking survivors, and people with disabilities or mental health problems. However, the acute shortage of professional social workers has forced many existing staff to cover multiple roles simultaneously — psychologists, counselors, social workers, and even administrators — often without sufficient academic or practical training. Their transfer under the administration of the Ministry of Justice in January 2023 has deepened concerns that the state treats social welfare more as an institutional control mechanism than as a fundamental right and responsibility.
Insufficient financial support
In addition to structural challenges and the lack of institutional support, another factor that directly affects the functioning of foster care is the financial support for foster families and other alternative care providers. Although the law provides compensation for families that shelter children without parental care, the current support is often insufficient to meet their needs.
For a child without parental care, the Ministry of Justice provides financial support of €350 per month, which is dedicated exclusively to the child. For a child with disabilities, the support increases to €450 per month.
Recently, some municipalities have also begun to financially support foster families through local budgets. Monthly payments range from €150 to €350, which, unlike the support from the Ministry of Justice, are intended for the families themselves, not the children.
Behrije remembers a time when financial support was much lower, but her commitment was just as strong. She says that when they first began taking in children, the support was €90, which increased to €150 in 2018. Since 2023, the support has risen to €350 for children without health problems and €450 for children with disabilities.
But according to Behrije, this support is still not enough, considering the many expenses required to meet the needs of a child like Genci, who has serious health issues. Even for other foster families, although the assistance helps ease their burden to some extent, it is not the reason they choose to take children into their care. The costs of medical check-ups, necessary medications for children with health problems, or formula for babies are often much higher than the support provided.
Municipalities that support foster families provide monthly financial assistance in varying amounts:
- Municipality of Prishtina: €300 per month
- Municipality of Prizren: €250 per month
- Municipality of Obiliq: €200 per month
- Municipality of Lipjan: €350 per month
- Municipality of Fushë Kosovë: approximately €150 per month
- Municipality of Istog: approximately €200 per month
Meanwhile, although Behrije has served as a foster parent for more than two decades, her commitment has never been recognized as formal work. In 2024, however, the new Law on Social and Family Services was adopted, recognizing, for the first time, foster families as providers of social services and paving the way for their inclusion in the pension scheme. The law is also expected to offer children over the age of 18 the opportunity to receive institutional support until the age of 26; this measure, however, has not yet been implemented.
SOS Children’s Villages and other child protection organizations have requested that the expansion of financial support for children without parental care be included in the draft Civil Code. However, the draft has not yet been adopted, as it failed to pass the first reading in the Assembly due to disagreements over the article related to the recognition of civil unions between persons of the same sex.
Even so, the dedication and care for children without parental care go far beyond financial support. If it were only about the money, OFAP would have ceased to function long ago, as the organization has been in a financial crisis for months. “A crisis began at the end of 2024 and is continuing into the first months of 2025. EU sanctions against the government have had an impact. Political developments, both domestically and internationally, affect our social services. We have been in a critical situation,” said Hoti.
In June 2023, the European Union (EU) imposed measures against Kosovo, suspending around 600 million euros in development funds. This created a major financial gap that has deeply affected non-governmental organizations, including OFAP, whose services largely depend on donors and government funding — both of which have been impacted by these measures.
As a result, most of the staff at OFAP continue to work without pay, often covering expenses themselves while traveling across Kosovo to visit children. “So far, 80% of the staff — from December until now [May] — have been working voluntarily,” said Hoti, adding that the commitment to these children is more than just a job; it is a mission that cannot be easily abandoned, even if it means spending your last euros to shelter a child.
Recently, Hoti herself wrote a children’s book titled Tales of Invisible Heroes, dedicated specifically to children without parental care. Proceeds from the book’s sales have helped the organization to survive.
Inspired by true events, ten stories of children without parental care were transformed into ten fairy tales, with nearly 4,000 copies printed.
“Each tale is a mirror of their heart, a gentle call to understand the fragile world they live in. It is a treasure trove of small hearts, a mirror of hope that illuminates even the deepest darkness,” said Hoti of the book.
At the end of one of the tales, she writes: “The fish Val learned that no matter where we come from, love and acceptance are the greatest forces that can unite us and make each of us feel like we are part of a real family.” This story aims to help children cope with abandonment and adjust to their new foster families. Each tale serves as both comfort and a guide, while also honoring the “unseen heroes” — the families who offer care, love, and stability when it’s needed most.
The emotionally difficult separation
Recently, during a routine monthly visit, the CSW workers delivered difficult news to the Nuredini family — Blendi’s status had been resolved. Although it may sound like a technical term, it essentially means that Blendi will only be able to stay with the family for a few more months, as the procedures for his adoption are being finalized.
“We will miss him because he’ll have to leave the house,” said Arbenita. “I used to think I was strong, but I’m not. I never get tired of him. I’m used to sleeping with him, waking up with him. I’m used to, wherever I go, to have him by my side.” Arbenita gently caresses Blendi’s hair, which she cut herself because, as she says, “he wouldn’t let a barber or anyone else cut it, only me.”
The entire family is struggling emotionally as they prepare for the day they will have to say goodbye to Blendi. Arbenita’s eldest son even asked the CSW official, “Can we adopt him?” Under the current law, however, foster families cannot adopt children in their care. This restriction is intended to avoid conflicts of interest and to maintain the professional and temporary nature of foster care, which is financially supported by the state.
According to this approach, allowing foster families to adopt would risk turning foster care into a direct adoption process, which could undermine professional standards and the child’s right to an impartial and fair process in the selection of adoptive families.
In essence, the law draws a clear distinction between foster care as a temporary form of shelter and adoption as a permanent family solution, with the aim of ensuring better protection in the best interest of the child.
Biological parents are given up to two years to improve their socio-economic conditions. If they fail to do so, the child is granted the status of a potential candidate for adoption, thereby initiating adoption procedures. In cases where the parents of a child placed in foster care are unable to create adequate conditions for the child’s return, legal proceedings are launched to resolve the child’s status. This includes filing a lawsuit for the termination of parental rights. If the biological parents are unknown, the law requires a waiting period of one year, after which the child’s case is considered resolved, allowing adoption procedures to begin.
According to the guideline, children typically stay with foster families for six months to one year. In practice, however, this period is often extended. Children with disabilities or health problems, such as Genci, tend to remain in foster care longer due to the lower interest in adopting them. In fact, the process from the moment a child is abandoned or removed from the care of their biological parents to the point of adoption can be quite lengthy.
The adoption panel, established by the Ministry of Justice, reviews the waiting list and makes decisions based on the order of families that meet the legal requirements for adoption. Once a family adopts a child, they have the legal right to change the child’s name and surname. Following the completion of the adoption process, the CSW is required to monitor the child’s upbringing for up to one year. After this period, the adoptive family assumes full responsibilities and legal rights equal to those of biological parents. Meanwhile, the number of abandoned children remains lower than the number of families seeking to adopt. According to the Kosovo Agency of Statistics (KAS), the rate of child abandonment has decreased over the past decade. In 2023, nine children were abandoned, compared to approximately 40 a decade earlier.
One of the biggest obstacles in the adoption process is that most applicant families insist on adopting children under the age of three, which makes the process more difficult for older children without parental care. According to Hoti, there are also families who wish to adopt only boys, while there are only girls available on the list.
“Years and years pass like this until the criteria are met, and as a result, the number of families waiting to adopt has increased relative to the number of children available,” said Hoti.
The maximum period a child without parental care can remain in a foster family is until the age of 18. Although the Child Protection Law provides for a new form of care — Supervised Independent Living — which aims to offer services and support for children without parental care from age 18 to 26, this measure has yet to be implemented.
As a result, in cases where a child reaches adulthood and can no longer remain in a foster family, the Guardianship Body is often forced to terminate care and services. In cases where the child has disabilities, the only available solution is usually placement at the Institute in Shtime — a form of residential housing that can negatively impact the child’s well-being and future development.
Foster families themselves prepare for these separations, which may feel natural to the system but are far from natural to them. “Separating from Blendi will be emotional, painful, but also something to be proud of. The fact that I was able to do something for him. I also pray to God that the family who takes him in will stay in touch, at least send me photos. Even though I know it might be wrong, I just want to see him grow up,” said Arbenita.
Behrija is also thinking about the day of separation, not because someone will adopt Genci, but because he will miss her.
“I have a plan for Genci. If I can send him to a family, for three months, while I go to my children (in the diaspora), because I don’t want to be completely separated.” With this, she also closes her long chapter of care: Genci’s name will be the last in Behrija’s diary.
Feature image and photos: Ferdi Limani / K2.0
Editor’s note: The names of the children in Behrija and Arbenita’s care have been changed to protect their privacy.
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